I'm super excited to find your space. And I am starting to scroll all the way to your start to find an answer to one question.... (which you might answer somewhere else, if so I am sorry)... but do you just not include Substack as a social media account? I'm not throwing shade at all, just genuinely curious. Thank you in advance!
(I did also message you in hopes I could find an answer and some inspiration...) thanks :)
Hey! Thanks for the note. I saw your DM too, but want to answer here in case others are curious for the answer.
I don't consider Substack, the newsletter platform, social media. I do consider Notes social media. Using the newsletter features alone is just like Mailchimp, or any other newsletter resource. The introduction of Notes did, however, enter Substack into the social media category.
Now, let me expand a bit on my POV and why I'm still here (on Substack, on Notes):
My brand is called Break Free from the Internet, but it's hyperbole. I don't expect many people can truly thrive in 2025 without using the Internet in some way. Instead, my mission is to help people reshape their relationship with the Internet and learn to use it as a tool. It's a big mindset shift.
For some, social media can be a tool, as long as they use it and don't let it use them.
What I'm trying to say is - what works for one, won't work for all - it's not a one size fits all approach. You have to take the time to see what system can benefit you. I'd argue for most, the healthiest approach is little to no social media, but everyone has to make that distinction on their own.
As for me, this is my system:
- I'm completely off of Instagram. I have checked in maybe once a month for ten minutes at a time. I haven't deactivated my personal account, though maybe I will with time. I have a Break Free account but only for the purposes of redirecting to the Substack.
- I have never been on TikTok, YouTube, Discord, etc.
- I still check in on my Facebook probably 1-3x a week. My kid's have sports and school groups that use Facebook to communicate. I bookmarked those groups, and I only go to those pages, I do not scroll my feed. I very truly wish I could delete my account entirely, but unfortunately, these groups are quite reliant on Facebook.
-I check in on Reddit, probably 1-3x, but it's Break Free from the Internet adjacent. I like the subreddits in this space - r/nosurf, r/digitalminimalism, etc. I get a lot of good inspiration there for this work. Same as Facebook, I bookmark the groups, I do not scroll.
-I use Notes to promote my newsletter. This one is tough for me, I will be honest, and I think it's possibly the crux of what you're asking (sorry for the long journey to get to this answer).
When I first launched my Substack, Notes was smaller, but growing. It kind of felt like being on Slack - the closest thing to having coworkers. I still didn't spend a lot of time there, however, it ultimately became my biggest growth driver. I got a huge boost from a few fast spreading posts. As soon as that happened though, I had to create some strict boundaries or Notes would become just another trap on my phone. I do NOT use the app, I only access Substack through my Desktop. I rarely spend more than 10 minutes scrolling. I only post if I actually have something relevant to my content to say.
Notes remains my #1 driver of growth, so I have to use it as a tool, though to be frank, I would not be on it if I had another option.
If at any point, being on Substack starts to become detrimental to my health, or the cons began to outweigh the pros, I'll bounce.
This is a very lengthy response, and I'm happy to chat more on DM if you have more qs!!
Thank you so much for your well thought out answer. I truly hope it didn't come off as condescending or anything like that, I just am really very interested in breaking free of my (this is hard to admit) addiction to my phone.
I really appreciate that you took the time to break down exactly how you limit and exercise restraint within each social media platform. (I have a tendency to take things super literally, which is why this is sooo helpful.
I really appreciate the subreddit recommendations as well, as a good way to transition into this massive change on my life.
I deleted instagram from my phone, but I did keep Facebook for similar reasons (except mine is for local community information and buy nothing communities. The good news for me is, that platform has lost its shiny fun aspect and I don't scroll it that often at all, but the bookmark thing is genius! I never would have thought about that.
I was one of the folks that came to Substack from the TikTok ban, but since then have primarily been using Substack as my "social media". It had left me feeling much more fulfilled and informed and honestly, inspired... so I was interested in the general perspective of Substack/Social Media.
Once again, I really thank you for your well thought out answer! You have gained a long time fan, and I can't wait to read through the rest of your content.
That being said... I do have one more question....
do you have any pointers about how to make these changes while in a relationship with someone that is also really into his phone. For example, even now as I type he is blasting TikTok videos and I'm getting my "fix" by looking/listening to his! I'm not trying to rain on his parade because he doesn't participate in social nearly as much as I do, but I was looking for any pointers you may have!
Thank you again! Your content is seriously so inspiring!
I can completely relate. My husband spends a lot of his free time on his phone, and it use to drive me crazy.
Here's my advice - see if he's willing to help you with a few boundaries. The biggest ones for me were:
1: Sound - I asked if he'd either listen to it quietly or with airpods on when I'm around
2: Date nights/shared meals - No phone out
When I first quit, I still found myself frustrated/distracted when he was mindlessly scrolling during "down times," but I really had to learn to let that go and only focus on what I can control -- myself.
The very cool thing -- after 4 months of him seeing the positive effects of quitting reflected in my life, he's started to make his own changes too.
We're not on the exact same journey, he still spends a little time on social, but he also has more free time for the things he wants to do that always got put to the back burner.
Thank you so much for your response! I think that these boundaries are totally on the table and something we can definitely work on! I am incredibily excited to participate in WAY less internet time. Right now I am focusing on minimizing social media time and redirecting to newspaper articles (still online unfortunately... I was unaware how difficult AND expensive actual paper newspapers are these days!). I have hidden some of my apps to make them less convenient for me to mindlessly get sucked into. I have really loved substack so far for the newsletters, but I have found it is harder to scroll endlessly, which is a good thing.
I am very commited to making a change and I am excited to see how "free" I can be. I will be checking out the detox as well! thank you so much for all of your insight and pointers.... you are an inspiration!
I've been looking for more blogs related to this topic - the only one I've found to be wildly helpful is Mehret Biruk's. Really looking forward to reading thru all your posts!!
I'm super excited to find your space. And I am starting to scroll all the way to your start to find an answer to one question.... (which you might answer somewhere else, if so I am sorry)... but do you just not include Substack as a social media account? I'm not throwing shade at all, just genuinely curious. Thank you in advance!
(I did also message you in hopes I could find an answer and some inspiration...) thanks :)
Hey! Thanks for the note. I saw your DM too, but want to answer here in case others are curious for the answer.
I don't consider Substack, the newsletter platform, social media. I do consider Notes social media. Using the newsletter features alone is just like Mailchimp, or any other newsletter resource. The introduction of Notes did, however, enter Substack into the social media category.
Now, let me expand a bit on my POV and why I'm still here (on Substack, on Notes):
My brand is called Break Free from the Internet, but it's hyperbole. I don't expect many people can truly thrive in 2025 without using the Internet in some way. Instead, my mission is to help people reshape their relationship with the Internet and learn to use it as a tool. It's a big mindset shift.
For some, social media can be a tool, as long as they use it and don't let it use them.
What I'm trying to say is - what works for one, won't work for all - it's not a one size fits all approach. You have to take the time to see what system can benefit you. I'd argue for most, the healthiest approach is little to no social media, but everyone has to make that distinction on their own.
As for me, this is my system:
- I'm completely off of Instagram. I have checked in maybe once a month for ten minutes at a time. I haven't deactivated my personal account, though maybe I will with time. I have a Break Free account but only for the purposes of redirecting to the Substack.
- I have never been on TikTok, YouTube, Discord, etc.
- I still check in on my Facebook probably 1-3x a week. My kid's have sports and school groups that use Facebook to communicate. I bookmarked those groups, and I only go to those pages, I do not scroll my feed. I very truly wish I could delete my account entirely, but unfortunately, these groups are quite reliant on Facebook.
-I check in on Reddit, probably 1-3x, but it's Break Free from the Internet adjacent. I like the subreddits in this space - r/nosurf, r/digitalminimalism, etc. I get a lot of good inspiration there for this work. Same as Facebook, I bookmark the groups, I do not scroll.
-I use Notes to promote my newsletter. This one is tough for me, I will be honest, and I think it's possibly the crux of what you're asking (sorry for the long journey to get to this answer).
When I first launched my Substack, Notes was smaller, but growing. It kind of felt like being on Slack - the closest thing to having coworkers. I still didn't spend a lot of time there, however, it ultimately became my biggest growth driver. I got a huge boost from a few fast spreading posts. As soon as that happened though, I had to create some strict boundaries or Notes would become just another trap on my phone. I do NOT use the app, I only access Substack through my Desktop. I rarely spend more than 10 minutes scrolling. I only post if I actually have something relevant to my content to say.
Notes remains my #1 driver of growth, so I have to use it as a tool, though to be frank, I would not be on it if I had another option.
If at any point, being on Substack starts to become detrimental to my health, or the cons began to outweigh the pros, I'll bounce.
This is a very lengthy response, and I'm happy to chat more on DM if you have more qs!!
Thank you so much for your well thought out answer. I truly hope it didn't come off as condescending or anything like that, I just am really very interested in breaking free of my (this is hard to admit) addiction to my phone.
I really appreciate that you took the time to break down exactly how you limit and exercise restraint within each social media platform. (I have a tendency to take things super literally, which is why this is sooo helpful.
I really appreciate the subreddit recommendations as well, as a good way to transition into this massive change on my life.
I deleted instagram from my phone, but I did keep Facebook for similar reasons (except mine is for local community information and buy nothing communities. The good news for me is, that platform has lost its shiny fun aspect and I don't scroll it that often at all, but the bookmark thing is genius! I never would have thought about that.
I was one of the folks that came to Substack from the TikTok ban, but since then have primarily been using Substack as my "social media". It had left me feeling much more fulfilled and informed and honestly, inspired... so I was interested in the general perspective of Substack/Social Media.
Once again, I really thank you for your well thought out answer! You have gained a long time fan, and I can't wait to read through the rest of your content.
That being said... I do have one more question....
do you have any pointers about how to make these changes while in a relationship with someone that is also really into his phone. For example, even now as I type he is blasting TikTok videos and I'm getting my "fix" by looking/listening to his! I'm not trying to rain on his parade because he doesn't participate in social nearly as much as I do, but I was looking for any pointers you may have!
Thank you again! Your content is seriously so inspiring!
I can completely relate. My husband spends a lot of his free time on his phone, and it use to drive me crazy.
Here's my advice - see if he's willing to help you with a few boundaries. The biggest ones for me were:
1: Sound - I asked if he'd either listen to it quietly or with airpods on when I'm around
2: Date nights/shared meals - No phone out
When I first quit, I still found myself frustrated/distracted when he was mindlessly scrolling during "down times," but I really had to learn to let that go and only focus on what I can control -- myself.
The very cool thing -- after 4 months of him seeing the positive effects of quitting reflected in my life, he's started to make his own changes too.
We're not on the exact same journey, he still spends a little time on social, but he also has more free time for the things he wants to do that always got put to the back burner.
I love all the questions, and you seem to be really committed to making change. I hope to see you join the detox if you ever feel ready! www.breakfreefromtheinternet.com/p/digital-detox.
Thank you so much for your response! I think that these boundaries are totally on the table and something we can definitely work on! I am incredibily excited to participate in WAY less internet time. Right now I am focusing on minimizing social media time and redirecting to newspaper articles (still online unfortunately... I was unaware how difficult AND expensive actual paper newspapers are these days!). I have hidden some of my apps to make them less convenient for me to mindlessly get sucked into. I have really loved substack so far for the newsletters, but I have found it is harder to scroll endlessly, which is a good thing.
I am very commited to making a change and I am excited to see how "free" I can be. I will be checking out the detox as well! thank you so much for all of your insight and pointers.... you are an inspiration!
I've been looking for more blogs related to this topic - the only one I've found to be wildly helpful is Mehret Biruk's. Really looking forward to reading thru all your posts!!